The divorce may be the end of conjugal union, but it devastates both the persons and leaves behind broken hearts. However, you start a new journey after divorce, as one cannot remain captive of the past forever. You got to move on as life is all about forgetting some and getting some.
One cannot stay alone forever, therefore after sometime the idea of dating naturally crops up. However, you must consider some important tips before you jump in again regarding post-divorce dating for healthier relationships.
Don’t rush, wait & watch before you enter into a new relationship
You should not hurry but wait until all the ties from your past relationship are severed completely. In fact, you must give yourself a year before you venture out or start focusing seriously on somebody. This particular post-divorce time you would need for yourself only to assess past and future plans.
This space will help you to analyze about what went wrong in your past relationship and also would help identifying your role in the break-up. The repetition of those mistakes and past experience may be bad for future relationship. Therefore, it is better not to rush but adopt wait and watch policy.
Minimize your expectations
Any relationship works with the endeavors of both persons only. It breaks down with high expectations and wrong judgments. Every relationship has its own set of challenges that include your future relationship also.
You cannot compare your ex with the current partner. It is not necessary what went wrong there would be wrong here too, or vice versa. Therefore, it is better to minimize your expectation and explore the best out of new relationship.
Honesty will work for you
Sometimes people tend to lie about the online status on dating sites. That could be highly misleading, as later on your partner could find-out about age, kids, interests, or likings when interactions develop more.
Your truth will help you find right one, who would accept you as you are, not as you are in your profile. Share your true values and you will get someone on the same page as you are.
Slow & steady
You should not just plunge into the pool, when you find the ‘right’ one or someone you may think suiting your taste and values. Give time to each other by talking over the phones or meeting in person often to understand each other better.
Tick all the expectation boxes by giving yourself a chance to explore more about each other during different activities and diverse opportunities to talk more with each other. Try different settings where friends of both sides are involved too. This will help you establish and back your judgment.
Less ‘cheers’ helps you in more cheerful life
It is the personal choice to drink or not to drink occasionally or regularly. However, alcoholic drinks in limits are wonderful to start a conversation which even helps reach out to the other person’s inner-self. There are many, who do not open up without a glass of wine inside.
This rule doesn’t apply to all as there are some who do not express even when they are drunk. All said, drinks can help you in forming certain viewpoint about your date.
Let your feelings out in open
Always be tolerant and kind and do not dwell in your past. Go along with the dating process, while paying respect to your instincts. Recognize the purpose of dating after divorce is to stay happy. Do not compromise with your happiness.
Accept the fact that it is difficult to have a ‘perfect’ partner as God has made us all with qualities and deficiencies. With careful dating plan, you can ascertain what your partner has more of those qualities or drawbacks!